transparentsy

I’ve known Ron Mexico for years now and can attest to his easy relationship with his parents.  Not perfect, but pretty darn good.

What’s your age?

38

Are both of your parents living?

Yes

What’s their marital status?

Married

How many siblings do you have?

2

How often do you see your parents?

Twice a week

What are some of the ways you spend time together? 

Meals, vacations, birthday parties, “just because”, do-it-yourself projects (work on car, clean gutters, lay paving stones), shopping, occasionally church

On a scale of one to ten, how much to you enjoy their company?

8 Mom, 10 Dad

Does spending time with them as a unit effect the dynamic of the visit?

No

What are some of the positive aspects of your relationship with them?

They love me unconditionally, they would do anything for me, they are proud of me. I consider my dad one of my best friends; we are honest with one another, we share common interest. My dad was a positive role model on how a dad should raise their children and be involved in their life. My parents sacrificed for their kids.

What are some of the negative aspects of your relationship with them?

I feel they are enabling towards one of my siblings.

Which is weightier, the positive or negative?

Positive

If positive, what are some of the aspects that contributed to a healthy relationship as adults?

Refer to the above comment regarding positive aspects of our relationship..

If negative, what are some of the aspects that contributed to a fractured relationship as adults?

We are not fractured, but they know I have an opinion on the matter of the treatment of them to my sibling and vice-versa.

What do you appreciate most about their parenting?

Spending so much time with me/us growing up.  My dad was always the dad in the neighborhood that would play ball, do activities with us outside.  We camped tons, we had a motor home and took week long trips to the beach, mountains, etc.  Overall, they were just present in our lives.

What do you wish they had done differently?

Encourage me to read sooner and more often, study more, introduce me to organized sports sooner that age 13 for baseball and golf at 17.

How well do you relate to your siblings? 

Not well with my older brother; better with my younger brother.

Do you think they share your same reflections on your parents?

Not exactly. My oldest probably felt they were too controlling, my youngest probably felt they were not controlling enough.  For me, I felt they found a nice balance off both.

Can you share a defining moment with your parents?

Two instances with my dad: 1) when he was diagnosed with cancer, 2) when he had by-pass surgery.  When the first happened, I realized how each and every additional moment I get to spend with my dad is golden.  I have no regrets,  I now have a heightened appreciation for each and every moment we spend together and I tell him I love him often.  My dad has 11 years on my mom, and my dad is in his mid 80’s, so I treat each moment with him as a bonus.

Has anything happened in recent history with them to change how you felt about them as a child?

Experiencing my parents provide childcare for my nieces and nephews and my own children has brought back memories of their parenting style as it pertains to problem resolution and discipline.  I still cherish my childhood, but I’ve been enlightened lately.